First, thanks so much to everyone who sent messages, comments, well wishes, etc today. It was quite touching to hear from so many of you, especially considering how patently BAD I've been at staying in touch in recent months. Thank you for remembering me today.

Now then. On the occasion of my hitting the big (and slightly-intimidating) 2-6, I'd like to let you in on the "huge new venture" I mentioned a few posts back.

I've included some visual aids to assist in explaining the deal. ( Click here, and wonder why all my big announcements can't be this much fun. )

Geez, it's been a while, hasn't it?

Twenty days since I last posted, which--for those of you keeping score at home--is the longest break between posts since...oh, mid-2002.

It's not that I had a lack of the usual things--interesting or otherwise--to share; oh no, there have been numerous times in the past three weeks in which I thought, "Oh, I should write about this on my LJ." It's really been a lack of time/energy which, in turn, has led to the significant drop in motivation to write.

...

So, for your reading pleasure at this late hour on a Saturday night (though, shouldn't you be out partying or something?), a brief summary of the past few weeks before we go on:

Week One: Julie came out this way and spent Thanksgiving with me. I would be Captain Obvious if I told you that it was so good to spend a whole week with her, wouldn't I?

Right. It was so good to spend a whole week with her.

Week Two: quite possibly the craziest, most-stressful week of my life (or, at the very least, the busiest week of my life outside of college). I alluded to these insane 16-hour workdays in the last post; well, I had five of 'em--yup, five of 'em--in a row during this week. My entire life for that week consisted of work, sleep, and the occasional grilled chicken sandwich from Subway (oh, and some drama to boot), leaving me completely drained.

And then we had to go and lose to ucla on Saturday. What an end to an already-pathetic week.

(Though, on the flipside, I was the first person to notice when the head honcho unexpectedly dropped by the store...those of you that know me and my obsession with Apple should know what a big deal that would've been to me.)

Week Three: I guess this was my catch-up week. It was pretty laid-back, so I spent a lot of time relaxing and doing absolutely nothing. It was much-needed, if you ask me.

...

And now, an announcement for the four or five of you that don't already know: I'm moving back to LA.

This has been something I've been contemplating with varying degrees of seriousness pretty much since mid-summer, after my extended visit there. Initially, I was planning to move back and share a room with kuhn and phatfhorn. But then Charlie and Tony--two of my other dear friends, both of whom I lived with during college--had a room open up in their apartment. Though I love Jonathan and Tim, I figured sharing a room with both of them might feel a little cramped, especially since I've had a room all to myself since I left college (not to mention that there's a California State law against three ridiculously-good looking guys sharing one room...I think).

So I took Charlie and Tony up on their offer. It's a great little spot in Burbank that I've spent a great deal of time at already, and I think I'm really going to like living there.

I don't care much for LA as a city--and it's not even fair trying to compare it to NYC--but with Julie going to school there and my largest and most cohesive circle of close friends still there, it's pretty compelling. I'm still working to pay off the ridiculous amount of debt I picked up over the last year, and I'm still planning to return to Iraq at some point...so really, with all that on my plate, being in LA right now seems to make a lot of sense.

I'm shooting to leave New York a week from now and get back home to spend Christmas with the fam before making it down to La-La Land. And how do I intend to get across this great country with all my stuff in tow, you ask? Pretty much in the same manner as last time. Except this time, I've got a couple wild things up my sleeve. One of which I'm saving for a future post; the other...well, the other is a crazy idea I basically ripped off from Michel Gondry.

Oh, but don't you worry, New York; this thing ain't over yet.

Would you believe today marks the 5th anniversary of this LiveJournal's inception?

Well, believe it, mister/missy. I've got the (truly laughable) proof right here.

As cringe-worthy as that first post is to me, I always enjoy going back through the archives and seeing how this journal--and more importantly, my writing voice--has developed over the last five years. In one sense, I like how much my voice has matured from those early days, in which--after finishing a post--I seemingly opened up a box of exclamation points and dumped them all over my writing.

But in another sense, I miss the raw, unadultered enthusiasm and naiveté that springs from those early writings. I miss the honesty and conviction with which I used to write; the sense that I couldn't care less about who was reading (perhaps because so few people were reading back in '01 and '02).

Still, this "Live Journal thingy" (as I called it way back when) has proven to be a wonderful tool in my own journey as a writer. Sure, it's often nothing more than a personal announcement/update forum for my friends and family to keep up with my various exploits. But somewhere in the course of the past five years and 800+ posts, this LJ helped me come to the simple conclusion that I really, really enjoy writing, to the point that I think I'd like to pursue it in some professional capacity at some point. (Ah, there's that unadultered naiveté that I was looking for!)

...

Now, for the truly bored amongst you: you want to see just how much my writing has changed over the years? The month of September--for whatever reason--seems to be a good benchmark (it's likely because September has always brought with it some major change or significant event in my life). So, if you want to see a truncated example of how someone's writing develops over five years' time, witness what I was writing each September: 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, and 2005.

...

In all this talk of anniversaries, I just realized that yesterday marked the three-year anniversary of my arriving in NYC. Wow. How did that happen?

My perfectionism-induced procrastination (or P.IN.P., which is, I believe, the official DSM IV-approved abbreviation for it) has kept me from writing this first announcement for a couple weeks now. Truth be told, trying to decide what I should say and what I should leave unsaid was the main cause of the delay. But regardless, it's time to give the official announcement and fill you in on what the next step is for me (in case you don't already know).

The short of it is this: I'm not going back to Iraq this fall. (Please, hold your applause...yes, I'm especially talking to you, Julie.)

( If you don't wish to read a rambling explanation about all of this, don't click here. )

So it's really going to happen, after all: I am going to Iraq, and I am going to teach at the Christian K-8 school I talked about in this post.

I know, this whole ordeal has been an on-again, off-again sorta thing. I'm sorry about that. This time, though, there's a real sense of certainty: flights have been booked, and in less than a month from now, I'll actually be in Iraq. More on that in just a sec.

First, how did all of this come about, you ask? Hadn't this whole thing fallen through? Well, yes...up until two weeks ago, that is. During another dreary Wednesday at work, I'd gotten a call from the mission agency. They'd been praying/thinking/struggling through their staffing issues, and to make a long story short, they didn't feel that they should be throwing the baby out with the bath water, so to speak. They had someone all gung-ho about going to teach at the school in Northern Iraq (i.e. me), and they'd realized that they still wanted expatriate staff to teach some of the classes and help expose the students to the Christian worldview. So the new opportunity to teach at the school was presented, and I was happy and excited to take it.

I'll be teaching humanities. (When they told me that, I got really excited, even though I'm not very well-versed in humanities...yet.) I'll teach for the spring semester, starting in January, and come back to the States for a relaxing summer, during which I'll determine if I'm up for teaching another semester. If so, then I'll go and teach during the fall, making it a whole year at the school.

Now, as for the next couple of months: as originally anticipated, I'm leaving New York at the end of this month (which is coming upon us faster than I can believe) and relocating to Nashville. The big new change now is that very soon after I get to Nashville, I'll be leaving for a brief training trip to Northern Iraq. I'll come back from that trip in time to spend Thanksgiving with family, then continue my training in Nashville for the next month. BUT, before I embark on any of this...I'm doin' like LL and goin' back to Cali. It'll be a very short trip--October 24th through the morning of the 27th--but I'm hoping to see as many of you as I can in that short period of time.

So...yeah. Again, I want to thank everyone who's been so supportive and encouraging. It means the world to me, it really does. I'm excited and nervous and scared and anxious and about 100 other things. And I know many of you will be experiencing some of those emotions as well--know that I don't mean to put you through all the emotional stress. I know not everyone agrees with what I'm doing, nor do I expect everyone to (in fact, I'd be a little worried if everyone agreed with me), but I trust that this is what I'm being called to do for the next year of my life.

Please e-mail me if you'd like to be put on the "support team" mailing list.

Thank you all so much for allowing me to share this big step with you.

Like the huge Iraq announcement last week, I feel like there's never a good time to say something like this. So no more stalling...here it is:

I'm not going to Iraq now. At least not like I originally stated.

What happened? Change of heart? Hardly. I was sooooo excited after making the announcement last Thursday, and subsequently receiving tons of (mostly) positive feedback, encouragement, and support. Plus, I had started the difficult process of "pulling up the stakes," so to speak, in earnest: I'd tendered my resignation at NYU earlier in the week (last day = 10/7), I was prepping for my huge support letter send-out, I was to share the news with the church board on the following Monday, we'd decided to shut sunnyside@seven down in light of my departure (and several other factors) after two more services, and we were breaking up the band. All difficult things to do, but I figured I was at the point of no return--this gig in Iraq was a sure deal at this point.

But last Friday--yes, the very day after I made the huge announcement, after four months of seriously considering this--I got a call from my contact at the office down in Nashville. His side of the conversation went something like this: "Well Dave, we've been thinking through our staffing policy, and for a number of reasons, we've decided to no longer send American staff over to Northern Iraq on a long-term basis. Instead, we'll have people go for 1-2 weeks at a time. As for you...we'd love to have you down here in Nashville, working a 9-5 at the office, prepping curriculum, working with the Iraqis by phone and e-mail, and then going over there for 8 weeks out of the year."

My side of the conversation: "Oh?"

(You'll surely agree that he didn't help his case one bit with those three magic words: nine. to. five.)

A few follow-up phone calls this week made it official: it wasn't happening. Simply put, moving to Nashville to work in the office wasn't at all where my heart was at, so I declined that offer. After four months of slow preparation (and in truth, over a year and a half after I first considered the idea), the whole thing was dead in the water. Saying that I was devastated might be overstating it a bit, but not by much. Not by much.

I should say that, in defense of the organization, they were looking out for my best interests. It turns out that recruiting was particularly difficult for them this year, and in the end, they only had one American raring to go teach in Iraq come January '06: yours truly. They said in our conversation this week that it was simply unconscionable for them to send me out there practically alone (save for the small handful of Americans currently on staff there). It makes sense, but it saddens me to know that they couldn't find more people who were willing to go.

The possibility of going over there still exists, though, and is something I'm going to consider in the weeks and months to come. This organization has other ministry/educational partners in the country, and one of these partners works to place native-English speakers in university classrooms to teach English. So we've discussed that as a possible alternative. To be honest, I just don't know right now. I don't know if teaching English to university students can fire me up as much as going to teach elementary school, which I see as a whole lot more foundational and vital to the well-being of the children and the country as a whole. But it would still be an adventure, and more importantly, an opportunity to assist people in a country damaged by three decades of war. We'll see.

In the end, this is an incredibly embarrassing post to write. I feel "had" (though that really isn't the case), and I'm terribly sorry for getting so many of you excited, inspired, and/or scared with this silly little notion of mine. As I said earlier, the timing really couldn't have been worse--if only I'd gotten the call a day and a half earlier, before making a huge public statement.

So add this to the ever-growing list of heartbreaks that I've been dealt in the past two years. Yes, I trust that the Lord has something else intended for me, but it's hard not to feel right now like anything else will be a bit of a letdown. I'm truly at a loss for what to do with my life at this point--I can't remember when I last felt so confused and unsure of everything.

Your thoughts and prayers are--as always--so very appreciated during this time.

I've been waiting for the "perfect moment" to make this huge announcement for a long while now, but I've come to the conclusion that such a thing doesn't exist. So no more delays. Here's what's about to happen with me:

I'm leaving New York.

Yeah, I know. If you've read even a fraction of what I've written here in the last two years, you'd think I was crazy for leaving a city that I love so dearly. Well, it gets better...or, as some might suggest, crazier:

I'm going to Iraq.

No, you read that right. I'm going to Iraq. If it's hard for you to believe that I just said that, you can imagine how hard it is for me to believe that I just said that, but that's exactly what I plan to do. I'm going to the northern (and relatively secure) part of Iraq to teach at a Christian K-8 school for the next year and a half.

What on earth made me come to this decision, you ask? Well, as you may know from reading certain lists that I've posted, I've long had a strong desire to either teach, do humanitarian work, or serve as a missionary in a third world country. I believe it's not just a strong desire, but moreover, a calling from the Lord to serve in this capacity for a period of my life. And I believe that period is now. Personally, I'm at the point where I can make this kind of short-term commitment. And I believe it's an important time to invest in the country of Iraq. The country has suffered through so much over the past three decades, and as violence screams from out of our television sets and newspapers on a near-daily basis, it's hard not to be moved with compassion for the Iraqi people. The people of the country are now rebuilding their society and regaining a sense of their identity and purpose that was taken from them during Saddam's regime, and one of the areas that will be vital to the reconstruction efforts is education.

So I intend to assist in the rebuilding of Iraq by teaching at this Christian school. I will work alongside fellow brothers and sisters in Christ--both American and Iraqi--to offer children a solid education in the Classical model in which they learn to think critically and express freely, and beyond that, to offer them an opportunity to learn of God's unending love for them.

The plan for me is this: I'm leaving New York in the beginning of November to relocate to Nashville, where I will undergo training at the organization's home office. Then, in January, I'll be deployed to Iraq. I'll work the spring semester, and get a teacher's vacation over the summer (I intend to come back to the States and just chill; maybe make another epic roadtrip, hopefully spend lots of time chillin' in NYC...Lord knows how much I'll miss this place!). Then, in September, I'll head back to Iraq, where I'll spend the entire school year on staff at CSM. I'll return from this short-term mission right around June 2007 (though I'm also envisioning a nice, lengthy excursion through Europe once I'm done with my duties at the school).

So, I know that that's a TON of information and you may still be in disbelief that I've decided to do this in the first place. One last thing I need to share with you for now: as is the case with most missionaries, I will need to raise my own financial support. All told, it'll be nearly $2,000 a month to cover my salary and various expenses--yeah, if you do the math you realize it's a LOT of money to raise, but I trust that God will provide. Here's what I'd like for you, my readers, to consider: if you, someone you know, or a church you attend might be willing to support me financially and be a part of the work I'll be doing in Iraq, please e-mail me at dave@usctrojans.com and let me know. If you can't support financially but can do so through prayer and emotional/spiritual support, please e-mail me as well. Either way, I would be so very blessed and honored to have your support.

This is easily the biggest (and yes, the craziest) decision I've made in my life--you'll surely be hearing about it more as time goes along. Excited? You bet I am. Scared? More than you can imagine (though not for the reasons that you might suspect). Needless to say, this will be quite the exercise in faith.

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

The NPs' Electric Version is quickly becoming one of my favorite albums. It's getting a ridiculous amount of iPod time these days.

I'm quite looking forward to their upcoming release, Twin Cinema.

I'll update more later, I promise, but I wanted to get the ball rolling again and post something.

It was a fun week with the folks in town. Included therein: lots of fun sight-seeing, Dave getting to be a tourist all over again, some good meals, some great views of the City, a few interesting/crazy "only-in-New-York" sort of things that happened to us, and just some good quality time spent with Mom and Dad as I introduced them to a city that is quite near and dear to my heart.

I took roughly 10 bazillion pictures (most of the Empire State Building, natch), so you can bet that I'll be posting some of those in short order. And though I won't give the play-by-play about the entire week, there are a few stories that are worth sharing, so share 'em I will.

...

In other news: I shaved my head tonight. It was a completely impulsive move that I made after looking at some of the pics from the last week and saying to myself, I'm not really sure whether I like my long hair or hate it, so I'll just shave it to mix things up a bit. I almost can't believe I did it (it's the first time I buzzed it all off in three years, and the third time ever), but I have to say that I like the look, and it'll be soooooo much nicer not to deal with the daily styling/brushing/etc for a while.

Maybe a picture of the new look will surface on the LJ at some point as well.

I probably won't be updating a lot for the next couple of days (yeah, like I wrote a lot last week), but there's a fairly good reason for that:

I'm spending most of every waking hour showing my mom and dad around New York City!

It's their first time visiting NYC--ever--so we're hitting all the tourist-y spots: Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island yesterday, Times Square today (Sunday), Empire State Building tomorrow, ditto Robert DeNiro's restaurant (not so much a tourist-y spot as it is a cool, expensive place I've been meaning to try for a while), Central Park on Tuesday, Broadway show on Wednesday...and finally, Wed. evening, an evening cruise around the City to cap their short maiden trip to the Big Apple.

It's been great having them here, but it's proving to be a lot more difficult to take them to all the sightseeing favorites, what with my mom's condition and all. Coming into this week, I knew that would be the case--and I think once it's all said and done they'll have seen/done a good portion of NYC--but it's a huge challenge trying to figure out how to get around New York City by doing as little walking as possible. So far, taxis have been our (money-eating) friends. Tomorrow, the big red tour buses will be (and they, too, are proficient at money-eating).

I'm taking a few pictures here and there, and I suppose I should throw one up for your amusement. Check it out. With this shot, I realize that I can never, ever, take a serious picture when standing in front of the Statue of Liberty. It's a just a photo op that begs for some playful faux-seriousness; wouldn't you agree?

I made mention of this earlier in the week, when I talked about my upcoming rock star duties. In truth, I can't believe it's taken me so long to come out with the full scoop...ah well. Here it is:

The band I'm playing guitar in is playing its first official gig this Sunday night!

The details: we're playing at La Kueva 2.0 on Queens Blvd. and 40th Street in Sunnyside (yeah, if that name sounds familiar, it's 'cause La Kueva was the venue of Thom's and my unforgettable first performance...how they let us back, I have no idea!). Doors open at 8, we go on around 10 PM...it's gonna be $5 at the door, and our good friend DJ El Silencio will be the "opening act."

This is indeed the band you saw in this picture. We're called Profate. It's really Thom's project--an experiment in rock music, of sorts, in which he plans on recording seven albums--so the majority of the songs we'll be playing are ones he recently recorded for his first album (though we are also going to perform a few sunnyside@seven worship numbers as a way of promoting the evening service).

( This is where I let my mind wander a bit. )

Anyway, enough musing. Bottom line: come check us out on Sunday if you're in the area! And if not, I'm sure I'll find a way to get some video and let you see a portion of the show (can you imagine how insufferable I'm gonna be as a father? I'll be recording everything for the whole world to see, I have no doubt about it.).

[UPDATE 1:13 AM] - I suppose you might enjoy listening to some of the songs we'll be playing. Thom's website has a download page that you can check out; my favorite is "Blueprint." Go ahead...give it a whirl!

I just picked up one of these bad boys:



You know, you always hear about middle-aged men who, when going through a so-called "mid-life crisis," go out and impulsively buy exciting new (and expensive) toys. Quite often, it seems, it's their dream car; a great illustration of such is in American Beauty, when Kevin Spacey's character, upon quitting his job and buying said vehicle, triumphantly tells his wife, "It's the car I've always wanted, and now I have it. I rule!"

And so, I think this is pretty much my equivalent--officially certifying/signifying my own quarter-life crisis.

Now granted, I've been planning this purchase for a while, so it's not that impulsive. However, I did have to make a semi-impulsive change of plans in order to buy this: I thought I would be able to use the NYU deferred payment plan to spread the cost of the new computer over a number of paychecks. At the computer store, though, I discovered that I was not eligible to use the deferred payment plan, so instead I whipped out the ol' Yankees tarjeta, and paid it all up front. (I know, I know, how hypocritical of me to carry a Yanks credit card...you see, way back when I was young and foolish--in the summer of aught-two--I signed up for it in order to get a free Yankees jersey at Yankee Stadium. I've since worn that jersey like twice, while paying through the nose thanks to the card's exorbitantly high interest rate.)

Anyway, I can't wait to get home and play with it. Tiger's included, so that'll be fun to explore. And I know I'm going to enjoy GarageBand!

I'm back at the office, having taken a whole week off to play tour guide. I've got lots of random things to share--most of which I probably won't get around to posting--but either way, rest assured that you'll be hearing more from me now that I'm back in front of a computer for 7 painful glorious hours a day.

...

First up, a rant, in the form of a (poorly-written) haiku:

May the twenty-fifth
Thermometer reads four-eight
A travesty, this.

...even if it's just a weekly rag with a small circulation.

( Case in point )

Here it is, as promised, the new LJ design (LJ friends, click here to check it out).

A bit of an introduction/explanation for all of this:

I've realized that blogging (or, more appropriately, LJing) has truly become one of my favorite pastimes (sad as that may seem!). And a few months ago, while having coffee with Helen in the West Village, I realized that I wanted to, uh, take my blogging to the next level, if you wish to call it that. I'd even thought about getting my own domain name and focusing on that instead of on LJ.

But I first decided to try LJ out on a paid user basis, to see if it could offer me more in the way of what I was looking for...namely, a personalized look and feel. And that's when I discovered the whole realm of customizations, something I hadn't even considered beforehand. So it took a while, and a lot of bumbling around like an illiterate fool, but I finally managed to kinda-sorta figure the s2 coding out, at least enough to get the LJ to my liking (and even then, I don't really understand the code that much--I just used a template and changed a few things up where I saw fit).

So this is what I've come up with.

Now for the details: the tutorial that I used was created by pamelajoy and kunzite1, based on the Opal s2 layout. I've added a few things, like the list of books I'm reading (something I always envied about Xanga users), a web counter (which I've wanted for the longest time, though I'm sure it'll deflate my spirits by showing how few people actually read this), and links to my "memories" page (newly updated!), photo album, and the lyrics page (ah! So that's why you made a big fuss about that last week!). I've also expanded my linklist, namely to include blogs that I read regularly, including some of my friends' (if you have a blog and want me to add you, just lemme know...ditto if you want me to take you off the list).

Of course, the change that is most easily-noticeable is the header image. It's a Photoshopped version of this shot that I took back in February last year, the lyrics of U2's City of Blinding Lights filling the sky behind the buildings. It's a big file (>100 KB), and if that becomes a problem for too many people, I may need to change it up. We shall see.

I'll probably keep tweaking it here and there, but this is pretty much the new look, at least for now. I'm rather pleased with how it all turned out, and I'd like to hear what you all think of the new look.

[EDIT 5:10 PM] I forgot to mention that I ran a preliminary design past Helen, whose sense of design and style I trust a great deal. So thank you, Helen, for your suggestions from a while back!